I'm not sure these phases are discrete. Or linear. I think we experience many of these phases at the same time, and go back and forth between them. I think the one constant through them all is change. Maybe change is always there, buzzing around behind the scenes, an invisible backdrop to everything else that is happening in our lives.

Change is inevitable. Much is beyond our control. So much of my life has been spent responding and adjusting to changes I never asked for, didn't want, and don't welcome. Death of a loved one and illness have been the hardest for me, but the list is long! Change can also be positive even though it feels scary at the time. It can be the kick in the ass we need to move on and out: the job I got passed over for; the friend who betrayed me.

And yet, all of these changes, which I wouldn't have sought and didn't welcome, turned out to have made me stronger. As Hemingway wrote in A Farewell to Arms, "The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places...."

I'm not sure if I answered your question, Omar. Thank you for sharing your journey and asking about ours.

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This is so timely for me. Thanks man! I’ve been thinking a lot about Sterling Hawkins’ book “Hunting Discomfort” and Ryan Holiday’s “The Obstacle Is The Way”. That what we want most is often on the other side of what scares / challenges us most. Sometimes it makes me mad, but I think I’m closer to a place of acceptance and working toward finding meaning.

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I’m just seeing this beautiful post and feel so honored to know you — thank you for the sweetness. You are the real deal 💖 🦞

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